Saturday, June 29, 2013

New Simplicity Patterns: Fall 2013

Simplicity 1594
How freaking cute is that. Any day now I should become a future Auntie through my boyfriend's brother so I'll have to start stocking up on cute baby stuff because hell or high water, I'm going to be that baby's favorite Aunt. It'll be hard since its other aunt's will like about 20 min away from it and I'll be a 10 hour drive, so that's a lot of material lovin'. I like how the shoes are NOT INTENDED FOR WALKING. That sticker should also be included on all 2.5"-plus heeled shoes.

Adult clothes?

Simplicity 1585
That's some 70's realness. I hate the gathering under the bust, it looks like the mark of a homemade garment. The shoulder cut-outs are weird with that style.

Simplicity 1586
 Classic, GREAT dress with fitting help. Nothing wrong here!

Simplicity 1587
I love the skirt, I hate the bodice. I wish they had more 1920's retro patterns.

Simplicity 1588
I am personally insulted by this. When this is the 4th pattern in the new release, there's not much hope.

Simplicity 1589
Hey, if you are going to learn to sew, there are worse patterns to start with. I made culottes when I was starting out. A lot of culottes. Otherwise, this pattern looks about 5 years too late.

Simplicity 1590
Ah, the 10" waists of the 1940's. Yowza that looks painful. I like what the peplum's doing here.

Simplicity 1591
That's about as nondescript as you're ever going to get. How come skirts never get waistbands?

Simplicity 1592
Snore. Nice elastic waist pants.

Simplicity 1593
Same pants, straighter side seams.

And the totally adorable baby girls win this round!

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

New McCalls Patterns: Fall 2013

Need I go on?

Its a pattern for a rectangle with a zipper. A pattern for taking your faux snakeskin boots and turning them into yetti fur and snakeskin boots. And why would you wear lace super short-shorts, an orange studded bag, and mismatching, though both aesthetically suited for cold weather, boots while lying prone on the ground? This is soul crushing.

Also, doesn't this seem like something the Kardashian's would peddle.

Dash away with Kardashian boot covers!

Whatever. In order now.

McCalls 6788
Me: Honey, what do you think of this dress?
Boyfriend: OMG who took a bite out of her side?
Me: Ok, the photoshop is a bit extreme, but what do you think of her top?
Boyfriend: I can't stop looking at her side. Why is one arm huge and the other so small?

McCalls 6789
Exuberant and profuse peplum. I'm over peplums on dresses, shirts are cute, but I don't personally think that peplumed (is that a word?) dresses ever really worked on anyone.

McCalls 6790
The sheer makes this look very messy, but I can kinda see something passable if it were opaque. Let's take a second to talk about the posing. They totally listened when I said pattern models should pose like the Vitruvian man, but is this really necessary? Both sides?

Berta, meet Gurt. Gurt, this is Bertha. I think you would like each other?

Guess not.

I could have fun with this.

McCalls 6798
 I like the sheerness from the shoulders to wrist, but that's mighty unflattering and dated.

McCalls 6791
Maxidress with a cute back that does not allow a wearable bra, but I can't figure out what's going on there, below the hips, you see it? The pattern says it has a 'shaped left side.' Its....wonky. Also, that fabric is pure jammies.

McCalls 6801
That's fine, pretty 80's if you want to do there. Would look great with yetti fur boots, but I don't have any.

McCalls 6792
80's theme party! Barbie syndrome is when your shoes and legs are the same color making it look like you are on your tippy toes all the time. Its almost incurable.

McCalls 6797
This looks mighty uncomfortable to wear, no? All that twisting and fabric. Its also pretty ugly.

McCalls 6793
Perfectly acceptable tunic if you accept tunics. I like the flower background, that's puuurty.

McCalls 6795
Sassy legal aid. Hitting the trends though, little collar and peplum. Don't peplums go better with sleeveless or is that just me?

McCalls 6794
She's a skinny minny! I kinda like this top and its shaped hem, but I question what boobs would do to it.

McCalls 6796
I would have been ALL OVER THIS twelve years ago.

McCalls 6803
The indie pattern company Thread Theory Design Inc. is getting a lot of press among the bloggers lately. Doesn't this look remarkably similar to their Newcastle Cardigan? I like TT's version better and so does the boyfriend.

Sunday, June 23, 2013

You know that saying...

"When its 90/90 temperature and humidity, make a wool jacket"? Whoever* made that up is a moron.

Happy Sunday.

*I made that up. I'm the moron.

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Pattern Review: Simplicity 2584

A couple minutes after yesterday's thunderstorm.

So I have a bunch of fabric, none of which really excites me anymore. I really like the cover of Simplicity 2584, but I don't like clothes made out of stiff woven cotton and even though I knew this was going to end badly, I just went ahead and did it. So I present Simplicity 2584 in a cotton poplin. Yea.

It looks like scrubs.
It sits really very high and very far from the back of my neck.
Invisible zipper on a casual shirt? Bleh.
I was going to add the gimmicky front do-dad from the cover of the pattern but for the life of me, couldn't get it to lay flat and centered so I threw it away in disgust. I also raised the slit by 3 or so inches because, whoa, dude, that was loooow. All the facings turned out really well so it isn't a bad pattern. Everyone else seems to love it and they look great in it. I think this would be really great in a stable knit with no dumb zipper so maybe I'll just think of this as a muslin and just consider it a win.

Otherwise its already being used for a good cause.
Hey Foliage, I'm probably not going to wear that so you might as make yourself more comfortable. 
There you go.

Sunday, June 9, 2013

Totes Awesome

These last few months have been rough. Capital-r, o, u, g, h, rough. And to make it all better by mom flew out last week to spend a whole week with me. We had fun, we cooked, (she) we cleaned.

I've been wanting to make a trompe l'oeil tote bag for a while and I got those Stained fabric markers from Sharpie a long time ago for that very purpose. Mom got the first one.

I used Megan Nielsen's instructions and a sturdy canvas, added a lining of quilting cotton, and used store-bought woven straps. The markers worked really well and everything you see here has already been washed once so the markers are resisting fading in the wash. My inspiration (blantant steal) was this.

Love you momma!

Sunday, June 2, 2013

Pattern Review: Archer Button Up Shirt

Excuse the sweaty face, its hotter than a chicken's feathery undercarriage around these parts.

I have been in desperate need of an Archer since the handsome beauty was released. The pattern is really really fantastic. Tons of what I call precision sewing though, as in lots of top stitching very very close to the edge. I confused myself with the instructions, but that's totally my fault. I was going back-and-forth from the printed instructions to the sew-a-long and messing myself all sorts of up. The sew-a-long is really really great though.

These are a lot of really great details in this shirt, and guess what?! You can't see them because I choose the loudest, busiest fabric I could find. And I love it! There are pockets, plackets, a collar, pleats, buttons, but who would know? Its a cotton voile (my absolute favorite fabric to work with, easy to deal with yet drapey) from Fabric Place Basement near Boston. I did see the fabric online from Hart's fabric about half what I paid at FPB, wtf, but in white, not the minty blue-green here. This is also my first animal print article of clothing, how terrible is that?!

Irish descendent legs.

This pattern takes a lot of fabric. When I was getting it cut and the lady found out it was a button down, she and the other women around the cutting table was convinced I was getting too much and didn't know what I was doing. Ye of little faith.

Anyways, I'm pretty passionately in love with this shirt. I even for the first time bought a buttonhole cutter, scalpel style, because I only wanted perfect buttonholes! I called one of the local small stores in Boston to see if they carried buttonhole cutters and the response, "You can just use a seam ripper for that." I've used a seam ripper for that my entire sewing life and I hate the results. Anyways, the cutter is amazing, no threads fraying or pulled, loved it.

(do not) Pop thy collar.
I want another one of these in a black textured voile with the butt ruffle. Strike that, I need one of these in a black textured voile with a butt ruffle (one size smaller).

Melted feline with a newly shorn belly.